Wednesday, July 2, 2008


I pull the trigger
And the laser hits its mark
Leaving a peep hole.

Today's haiku is brought to you by laser tattoos. As a man of the late twentieth century, I of course have adorned my epidermis with ink and pain. I currently have two tattoos and have designs on a third. The saying goes that once you get one tattoo, the desire to get more becomes almost overwhelming. Sadly, when I received my first two tattoos, I had trouble with the process of having a tiny needle stick into my skin repeatedly. The need to see my breakfast back on the table after ingestion is negligible, and I don't foresee myself overcoming that correlation anytime soon. Laser etching, though it seems painful, is at least fast. I imagine I'd be able to finish a design or two before mouth-voiding my last meal. If I can get my hands on one of these things, then expect to see the entirety of the first generation Transformers on my chest in the coming weeks.

For those of you that aren't interesting in scarring your body either temporarily or permanently, then perhaps you might enjoy a new hairstyle. Express your inner animal via a carnivorous coiffure.

Anywho, I should be off. I've got to find a good picture of Jetfire. Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
CHP hands out 15 cell-phone citations in county Tuesday
California Highway Patrol officer Grant Boles says enthusiasm for patrolling is what got him into law enforcement. That includes patrolling for violators of the new cell phone law.
"I've seen numerous fatalities caused by distracted drivers," he said Tuesday, the day the new law prohibiting use of a cell phone while driving without a hands-free device went into effect. "We support any law that keeps people focused on the roads."
CHP officers issued 15 citations to cell phone users in the county Tuesday. Overall, officers were more impressed by the levels of compliance with the new law than disappointed by the number of scofflaws, Boles said.
However, the new law has brought a new unexpected danger to the streets of California. Boles recalled several instances in which a car passed by with no driver visible through the window. "It seems as though people are ducking under the dashboard to take calls. That's probably not good."
Initial reports show a three thousand percent increase in the number of accidents caused by drivers tucked under the steering wheel of their cars.
"People will go a long way to not get caught breaking the law," Boles said.



Psst! Thanks to Alicia for the hairdo link!

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