Thursday, May 15, 2008

Belawful!

The sun glistening
In the early morning dew;
Beneath it all: WORMS!


Time is limited today as I scheduled my appointment to get my car checked out right in the middle of blog time. Apologies.

The thing that makes me angry about the car appointment is the fact that it's a beautiful day. The temps are supposed to be in the low 70's, it should be sunny all day long, and I have no obligations, except to get my car checked out. I already know it's going to cost a good chunk of change just for them to plug their computer into my car and read to me what the computer says. I also know that whatever the computer says is going to result in an estimate of several hundred dollars. That has soured my mood, and I haven't even gone in yet. In fact, it's just the possibility of what could happen that has soured my mood. I'm anticipatorily angry, and that, my friends, is the worst kind of anger.

I have already taken a little of my aggression out on a poor little wasp's nest. No, I did not use wasp spray, nor did I douse the nest in gasoline. I stood near the nest and told the inhabitants how disappointed I was in them. Before long, they were all hanging out of the nest in tiny wasp nooses. The power of the word is strong.

But you should not have your lovely day spoiled by my predicament. If you need a thing that will make you smile, then you should check out episode 1 of Dinner With Fotis. It's delightful. However, sometimes the audio player doesn't work correctly and it sounds like two chipmunks talking. That makes me so mad!

Sorry. It seems that my ire knows no bounds. I should just go, before things get really ugly. Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
New revealing Starbucks logo has group screaming 'Slutbucks!'
Seems that one person's smut is another person's morning latte.
A Christian group out of San Diego has found grounds for outrage over the new logo for Starbucks Coffee.
The Resistance says the new image "has a naked woman on it with her legs spread like a prostitute," Mark Dice, founder of the group, said in a news release. "Need I say more? It's extremely poor taste, and the company might as well call themselves, Slutbucks."
Dice went on to say that the new logo will lead to thousands of sexually-aware teenage boys getting 'seduced' by the logo and attempting to have intercourse with a cup of scalding hot coffee.
"We either have to get Starbucks to change the logo back now," Dice insisted, "or we risk the burning off of the next generation's birthing sticks. Is that what we want, America? Is it?"
With a scowl on his face, Dice donned his tri-corner hat, jumped onto his horse and rode back into the late 1600's.


Yay!


Tomorrow!



Psst: If you want to see the old and new Starbucks logos, head on over to the Strib.

4 comments:

Michael said...

Anticipatorily: great word!

Loved the joke.

Peggy Larson said...

My worry with this new logo is that teenage boys will believe all women have a five inch gap between each breast.

Joe Ferrari! said...

I;m not sure how anybody can be outraged about the "seductiveness" of the new logo. Honestly, I'd be more concerned about the logo giving people phobias of naked women.

Fred said...

The new logo is actually the old logo, only with the nipples covered by the Mer-being's hair. And the logo is itself based on old sailor folklore about mermaids. Check it.