You may have the urge
To tattoo "Mom" on your chest.
She'd prefer a card.
First and foremost, HUGE Theater is at Punch Out! tonight at 11 pm at the BNW. If you haven't been to Punch Out!, then you might not know that it's an improvisational competition in which two teams enter and, well, two teams leave, but not before one is recognized as the better of the two. Tonight, HUGE competes against 1-2-3 Improv!, a feel-good group that uses improvisation to improve the lives of those watching. We're going to need all the help we can get, so come on out and support HUGE.
Secondly, today is a big, big day for several of my friends. Two couples I know are purchasing homes today, while another friend is celebrating a birthday. Congrats are due to all involved. Having both purchased a home and celebrated a birthday in the past, I know that both activities can be stressful and exciting. No matter how rough it gets, always remember that at the end of the day, you've earned yourself a cake. Don't miss out on that.
On that note, I know of one person that would buy houses just to earn himself some cake. I cannot endorse that sort of lifestyle. You risk going into deep, moist, chocolaty debt that you may never be free of.
Thirdly, Today's Joke!
Suspended driver's license surprises Rybak
Minneapolis Mayor R.T. Rybak has been driving without a valid license for nearly three months.
His driver's license has been suspended since Feb. 14 because he failed to pay the full amount of a 2006 speeding ticket, Minnesota court records show.
Local news outlets, upon hearing of the story, promised to sensationalize it to the best of their abilities, but also complained that the story lacked the "hookers, drugs, and/or illegitimate children" needed to catch the eye of the nation.
Said one Fox 9 news reporter, "How are the Twin Cities going to stay a major metropolitan area if our leaders can't get into national attention-grabbing news?"
The reporter then went on to urge either Rybak or St. Paul mayor Chris Coleman to "shoot some kids while roaming down the streets in a pants-less drunken stupor." The reporter then produced a bottle of Night Train and a 9mm handgun urged the mayors to "come and make some ratings."
Psst! Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there.