If every morning
Began with dentist visits,
We'd all kill ourselves.
Apologies for the post-morning missive. Today's normal blog time was interrupted by a trip to my dentist's office. I, like everyone else that has teeth, do not enjoy the dentist. Besides the invasive fingers and sharp instruments jammed in my mouth, dentists (and their assistants) have a natural tendency to make me feel bad about enjoying normal, everyday things like soda pop, Milk Duds, and not flossing. Hey, I'm only human! However, since the visit only happens once every six months, so I can't really complain that much, can I?
Anywho, after the initial investigation, the dental assistant said that everything looked great. At that point, my normal worries about the regular visit subsided. Perhaps this would be the visit in which they would just do a visual scan of my chompers and let me on my merry way without all of that scraping and spitting. But, while I was fantasizing about not being in the dentist's office, I must have missed the assistant say that she was going to make me bleed, because that's exactly what she proceeded to do for the following thirty minutes. I counted some twelve different "tools" utilized in the process of making every part of my mouth bleed. Egads. I think I'll still be having nightmares about that come next February...
Sadly, I should be off. Having lost a morning to the dentist, I have a lot of things to do before the sun sets itself. And before I pass out from loss of mouth-blood. Before I depart here's Today's Joke:
Packers address trade; Favre set to join Jets
Wrapping up the end of the Brett Favre era in Green Bay, the Packers held a press conference on Thursday to discuss their trade of Favre to the New York Jets.
"This is really a bittersweet time for the organization," Packers president Mark Murphy said at the news conference. "I think we're all sad to see Brett Favre's career as a Packer end."
Favre was scheduled for a tour of the Jets' new training facility in Florham Park, N.Y., on Thursday afternoon.
"I am looking forward to seeing Brett Favre in a New York Jets uniform," said Jets chairman and CEO Woody Johnson in a statement issued early Thursday. "He represents a significant addition to this franchise, and reflects our commitment to putting the best possible team on the field."
"Brett's decision to join the Jets brings our plans for assembling the best team possible closer to fruition," Johnson continued. He then revealed plans, dubbed "Operation: Golden Oldies," to bring Warren Sapp, Michael Strahan, Tiki Barber, Jerome Bettis, Jerry Rice, John Madden, Dick Butkus, and Jerry Azumah out of retirement.
Psst! The Four Humors fellas have a lovely interview in The Rake. Good work, gents!