Monday, June 2, 2008


The sun hits its peak
And slowly works its way down.
I crash much faster.

Apologies for today's delayed missive. I awoke early enough, but my morning schedule was filled with a corporate show at the Workshop. Now, two bus trips, 4 hours worth of improvisation and seventeen cups of coffee later, here I am. Shaking. Most of the blood in my body has been caffeinated to Mountain Dew levels. I can actually see through my computer. This missive shall not be long, for I have a need to run at top speed for three or four miles just to give my heart a reason for beating this quickly.

There are only two items of note that need mention today, besides the usual poem and stab at current-events-related humor. Firstly, watching BNW mainstage actor Bobby Gardner play Rock Band is the most joyous way to spend an evening. Never before have I seen someone pour so much passion out for his virtual groupies. It's inspiring. I might have Bobby come by every night just to remind me what the sheer power of excitement can do.
On the opposite end of the "televisions and eye balls" enjoyment spectrum: after the Saturday night mainstage show, I came home to see Kimbo Slice punch a man's ear off on CBS. I must warn you: if you click that link, you will see a man punch another man's ear off. Before clicking, ask yourself, "Do I need to see someone's ear get punched off?" If you answer in the negative, do not click the link. It's as simple as that.
If you do watch it: Wowzers. That ear got totally punched off.

I should be off. Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Winning Again, Clinton Weighs Her Options
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton won another overwhelming victory over Senator Barack Obama on Sunday — this time in Puerto Rico — even as many Democrats, including some of her supporters, suggested it would be best if she dropped her threat to battle on past the end of the primary voting on Tuesday.
Mrs. Clinton won by 2 to 1 in Puerto Rico, where she seemed to revel in a weekend of campaigning even as her surrogates fought in Washington to keep her campaign alive.
“I think it will be most likely the case in a few days,” Mrs. Clinton said from San Juan. “I will have won the most votes — more than anyone in the history of the primary process.”
She added: “Senator Obama has a narrow lead in delegates. And we’re going to have to make our case to the automatic so-called superdelegates. And I think my case is clear — more than 17 million people voted for me.
Mrs. Clinton’s count includes Michigan, where Mr. Obama’s name was not on the ballot, and it does not include some caucus states won by Mr. Obama and where the popular vote was not reported. The count also fails to include any vote cast for Obama in Illinois, as Clinton reasoned that Obama had an unfair advantage in Illinois being that he serves as Senator for that state. Also, any vote cast for Obama by a female has been re-counted as a vote for Hillary, noting that the initial vote for Obama was "probably a mistake caused by menstruation-related blurred vision."
"Obama is running on a campaign of 'change'" Clinton continued. "Look! I've tried to change how we go about punishing states for not following DNC rules, and now I'm changing how we count votes! Who's the real 'changer' around here? Me!"



Psst! The Skirt Turtles are playing at Nokomis Field number 7 tonight at 6 pm. Bring a picnic dinner and cheer us on to victory!

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