Attendinique!

Like a magician
I vanish into the air
And return unharmed.


Well, look who came back to the blogosphere! Me! Apologies for a lack of missive on Friday. The day got away from me. You understand, don't you? I certainly hope so...

Anywho, this weekend was quite the collection of days. Between Thursday night and Monday morning, I saw a concert, painted a bedroom, performed in two BNW shows, had a corporate event, enjoyed a Father's Day breakfast and entertained people in an electricity-free house.

Let's hit the highlights!
Thursday night, the wife and I (and the older brother and his lady) went to the Cabooze's outdoor stage to catch Gogol Bordello, a "gypsy punk" band made up of a crazy-haired singer, an elderly fiddle-player, a mild-mannered accordionist, two girls whose only jobs were to scream and play cymbals and marching band bass drums, a Latino rapper that wore a Mexican wrestler mask, and a few others. They put on one heck of a show, bouncing from one song to the next with only a moment of break between them. Gogol Bordello's live show gets a FOTIs.
The people in the audience, however, were even better than the show itself. Throughout the evening, we saw:
- three women in their sixties, one of whom spent twenty minutes putting on lipstick, enjoying the band's antics;
- a lady dressed more conservatively than a polygamist's wife breaking up a fight between two men (that were each over a foot taller than her);
- an obese woman wearing a sports bra humping a bicycle;
- a man that could not keep his body from flailing whenever the music played; and
- the world's last Yes fan.
The Gogol Bordello audience gets the very rare honor of MIKE FOTIS. Well, everyone except the guy that asked me if he could rub Theresa's belly. That guy's a jerk.

On Saturday, after the BNW show, I invited folks over for a little Rock Band fun. Also, I figured, we could all share the can of Pabst Blue Ribbon I had sitting around. Upon arriving home, I discovered that the storm that hit the Twin Cities knocked out our power. People still came over, but instead of playing Rock Band, we talked. As one would have guessed, the power came on ten minutes after everyone left. Damn you, Xcel! If I was Alanis Morisette, I would totally put that line into "Ironic: Part Two."

Yesterday, between putting coats of paint on the walls in my bedroom (I did this awesome wizard mural. It's really... awesome!), I walked over to a local restaurant for breakfast. When I went to this restaurant on Mother's Day, the ladies got free flowers, free mimosas, and there was a jazz trio playing (for free!) On Father's Day, there was jack-squat. I'm not sure what I was expecting (maybe a free screwdriver, or a free screwdriver, or a free concert by Screwdriver. Any of those would have been nice. You know, for the dads.

Well, I should be off. With all of the antics of the weekend now over and done with, I need to get to the antics of the week. Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
PVC Shower Curtains Hazardous to Your Health
A U.S. environmental non-profit organization warned last week that polyvinyl chloride (PVC) shower curtains might be dangerous for our health as they shed 108 poisonous chemicals into the air after being unpacked.
The Center for Health, Environment and Justice analyzed five house-brand curtains and liners and found that the PVC shower curtains contained at least seven substances (methyl isobutyl ketone, toluene, ethylbenzene, acetophenone phenol, xylene and cumene) that are considered hazardous air pollutants. These chemicals are very dangerous for the environment and for people’s health, as well.
The “new shower curtain smell” might be a threat for lungs, central nervous system, liver and kidneys, leading to serious conditions, sometimes cancers, the CHEJ said in its report.
"PVC shower curtains should be eliminated from homes and should be replaced with safer alternatives," the CHEJ’s science director, Stephen Lester wrote in a statement. "If you have PVC shower curtains in your home, only allow people you want to kill into your shower."
On a similar note, the US Government has added PVC curtains to the list of "weapons of minute destruction." This list also includes tomatoes, Mattel toys, dog food, the sun, and fluorescent lights.

Yay?


Tomorrow!