Friday, January 16, 2009


If you don't learn from
History, you can play it
In video games.

Apologies for the lack of blogs this week. I had a writing deadline for the BNW, which meant that I had reschedule my missive-making time. Well, that's my excuse for the first half of the week. Thursday, being the first day with free time penciled in, was spent hanging with the kid and playing Call of Duty: World at War. It's not my fault - she really wanted to watch me reenact the greatest events of the greatest generation. Who am I to argue?

Anywho, whilst playing through Call of Duty, I started thinking about all of the WWII games I've played in the past, as well the many, many WWII games I have not and probably never will play. That, in turn, got me to thinking about what I really want to see in a WWII game. I believe it would be something like this:
Prepare to battle in the world's greatest war as history's greatest man: Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
The US has been bombed and Germany, Italy, and Japan are threatening to take over the world with their weather-controlling doomsday device. Freshly outfitted with a set of robot legs that can control time, FDR is sent (by himself!) on a slew of one-man missions to the western front, the Pacific theater, Siberia, Middle-Earth, Iowa, northern Africa, and the fourth dimension (which is overrun by werewolf-zombie-Nazi soldiers!)
You'll get help from sexy sidekick Douglas MacArthur, sexy assistant Winston Churchill, and sexy double-agent Eleanor Roosevelt, and you'll need it when fighting the epic no-holds-barred battles with Emperor "Hero"-hito (He's a man! He's a hoagie! He's a Moagie!), Mecha-Mussolini, and of course, Tyrannosaurus Hitler. Armed with only a Bowie knife, a bazooka, and a razor sharp wit, will FDR succeed in bringing peace to the world? Only you know that answer.

Oh man. Now I just need someone to make this game.

I should be off. Before I depart - if you happen to live in Chicago, then go see the BNW at Sketchfest this weekend. Yay!

No joke for today. I'm hoping that the rest of the post will fill your laugh quota for the day.


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