Let us go sledding
Right from the snowy hill's peak
To the hospital.
'Tis Monday, 'tisn't it? Apologies for the late missive. The wife had a day off from work, so today was family fun day. Nothing wrong with that, except for the resulting delayed blogging.
Anywho, this weekend was a jam-packed one. The cold snap finally broke, meaning that those out-of-door activities (such as shoveling, walking the dog, and generally not being inside) could resume. On Saturday, we hopped down to Burnsville (the town that's always on fire... with excitement!) to watch my little brother get married. Congrats to the happy couple! Sunday saw a return of errand-running and other assorted funnery that Friday could not handle. Today was just there for us to breathe.
Tomorrow? Why, tomorrow is a new day. A day that many will celebrate and some will rue. I'm excited not to see Obama become President, but to watch everyone else react to his Presidency. I'm not certain that Barack will be able to immediately change the world for the better, but those millions that think he can just might. I'll be watching intently.
Sadly, I should be off. I need to capitalize on these passing holiday hours whilst I still can. Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Sources: Obama may quickly reverse abortion policy
President-elect Barack Obama is considering issuing an executive order to reverse a controversial Bush administration abortion policy in his first week in office, three Democratic sources said Monday.
The sources said Obama may use the occasion to reverse the "Mexico City policy" reinstated in 2001 by Bush that prohibits U.S. money from funding international family planning groups that promote abortion or provide information, counseling or referrals about abortion services. It bans any organization receiving family planning funds from the U.S. Agency for International Development from offering abortions or abortion counseling.
Sources also say that Obama is considering other actions to reverse Bush's policies. He may, within his first one hundred days, reverse the upper-class tax cuts that Bush put into place during his Presidency. Obama is also thinking about an immediate withdrawal of troops from both Iraq and Afghanistan. Finally, Obama has been inquiring about the feasibilty of renaming all shrubbery "Baracks" and removing "W" from the American English accent, replacing it with a fist bump.
"It's time for the fistbump-orld to move on from Bush's reign of ineptitude," Obama said in a brief interview. "Come fistbump-ith me and live in hope once again."
Obama then flew out of the room and stopped an asteroid from crashing into Earth.
Huzzah!
Monday, January 19, 2009
Friday, January 16, 2009
Caladutia!
If you don't learn from
History, you can play it
In video games.
Apologies for the lack of blogs this week. I had a writing deadline for the BNW, which meant that I had reschedule my missive-making time. Well, that's my excuse for the first half of the week. Thursday, being the first day with free time penciled in, was spent hanging with the kid and playing Call of Duty: World at War. It's not my fault - she really wanted to watch me reenact the greatest events of the greatest generation. Who am I to argue?
Anywho, whilst playing through Call of Duty, I started thinking about all of the WWII games I've played in the past, as well the many, many WWII games I have not and probably never will play. That, in turn, got me to thinking about what I really want to see in a WWII game. I believe it would be something like this:
Prepare to battle in the world's greatest war as history's greatest man: Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
The US has been bombed and Germany, Italy, and Japan are threatening to take over the world with their weather-controlling doomsday device. Freshly outfitted with a set of robot legs that can control time, FDR is sent (by himself!) on a slew of one-man missions to the western front, the Pacific theater, Siberia, Middle-Earth, Iowa, northern Africa, and the fourth dimension (which is overrun by werewolf-zombie-Nazi soldiers!)
You'll get help from sexy sidekick Douglas MacArthur, sexy assistant Winston Churchill, and sexy double-agent Eleanor Roosevelt, and you'll need it when fighting the epic no-holds-barred battles with Emperor "Hero"-hito (He's a man! He's a hoagie! He's a Moagie!), Mecha-Mussolini, and of course, Tyrannosaurus Hitler. Armed with only a Bowie knife, a bazooka, and a razor sharp wit, will FDR succeed in bringing peace to the world? Only you know that answer.
Oh man. Now I just need someone to make this game.
I should be off. Before I depart - if you happen to live in Chicago, then go see the BNW at Sketchfest this weekend. Yay!
No joke for today. I'm hoping that the rest of the post will fill your laugh quota for the day.
Huzzah?
History, you can play it
In video games.
Apologies for the lack of blogs this week. I had a writing deadline for the BNW, which meant that I had reschedule my missive-making time. Well, that's my excuse for the first half of the week. Thursday, being the first day with free time penciled in, was spent hanging with the kid and playing Call of Duty: World at War. It's not my fault - she really wanted to watch me reenact the greatest events of the greatest generation. Who am I to argue?
Anywho, whilst playing through Call of Duty, I started thinking about all of the WWII games I've played in the past, as well the many, many WWII games I have not and probably never will play. That, in turn, got me to thinking about what I really want to see in a WWII game. I believe it would be something like this:
Prepare to battle in the world's greatest war as history's greatest man: Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
The US has been bombed and Germany, Italy, and Japan are threatening to take over the world with their weather-controlling doomsday device. Freshly outfitted with a set of robot legs that can control time, FDR is sent (by himself!) on a slew of one-man missions to the western front, the Pacific theater, Siberia, Middle-Earth, Iowa, northern Africa, and the fourth dimension (which is overrun by werewolf-zombie-Nazi soldiers!)
You'll get help from sexy sidekick Douglas MacArthur, sexy assistant Winston Churchill, and sexy double-agent Eleanor Roosevelt, and you'll need it when fighting the epic no-holds-barred battles with Emperor "Hero"-hito (He's a man! He's a hoagie! He's a Moagie!), Mecha-Mussolini, and of course, Tyrannosaurus Hitler. Armed with only a Bowie knife, a bazooka, and a razor sharp wit, will FDR succeed in bringing peace to the world? Only you know that answer.
Oh man. Now I just need someone to make this game.
I should be off. Before I depart - if you happen to live in Chicago, then go see the BNW at Sketchfest this weekend. Yay!
No joke for today. I'm hoping that the rest of the post will fill your laugh quota for the day.
Huzzah?
Monday, January 12, 2009
Bloglessness!
Beneath all this snow,
Buried under winter's weight,
Lies my little blog.
Apologies, but today shall remain blog-less. This morning was jam-packed with a trip to the doctor for some baby shots, and this afternoon is jam-packed with rehearsal and other things theatrical. This evening? Why, this evening is for me and me alone.
Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Golden Globe after-parties still boozy, spirited
It was a subdued night of post-Golden Globe Awards partying for Hollywood, but the bashes were lavish and extravagant by any other standard.
A year after the writers' strike shut down the awards show ceremony and its after-parties, the alcohol flowed again at several shindigs Sunday at the Beverly Hilton Hotel.
Despite the recession, post-Globe revelers shared booze, food and the sheer will to make merry.
"We in Hollywood have to remind the world," said one reveler, "that when things get tough and life gets you down, drown your sorrows in alcohol and desperation. It's the true American way!"
Huzzah!
Tomorrow!
Buried under winter's weight,
Lies my little blog.
Apologies, but today shall remain blog-less. This morning was jam-packed with a trip to the doctor for some baby shots, and this afternoon is jam-packed with rehearsal and other things theatrical. This evening? Why, this evening is for me and me alone.
Before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Golden Globe after-parties still boozy, spirited
It was a subdued night of post-Golden Globe Awards partying for Hollywood, but the bashes were lavish and extravagant by any other standard.
A year after the writers' strike shut down the awards show ceremony and its after-parties, the alcohol flowed again at several shindigs Sunday at the Beverly Hilton Hotel.
Despite the recession, post-Globe revelers shared booze, food and the sheer will to make merry.
"We in Hollywood have to remind the world," said one reveler, "that when things get tough and life gets you down, drown your sorrows in alcohol and desperation. It's the true American way!"
Huzzah!
Tomorrow!
Friday, January 9, 2009
Fillered!
If you stay quiet
And listen very closely,
You'll hear my day pass.
Egads! What a day this has been! The morning was occupied by a trip to WCCO radio for a short interview (during which I said, "Yeah," "uh huh," and "Definitely." That's all I said. No more, no less.) After the interview, errands were run and the baby was forced (forced!) into a nap. All that takes time. And now, I have no time left for the finer things, such as blogging. Apologies.
I do have a quick bit of advice, however. If you're planning on making a road trip this weekend (or anytime son, for that matter) and decide to eat at a truckstop, DO NOT order the turkey melt. I know they call it turkey, but friends: that ain't turkey.
Anywho, before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Blagojevich says his impeachment by Ill. House wasn't unexpected, part of ongoing dispute
The Illinois House voted overwhelmingly Friday to impeach Gov. Rod Blagojevich, setting up an unprecedented trial in the state Senate on whether he should be thrown out for abuse of power.
The governor responded with what has become trademark defiance since he arrested on federal charges a month ago. He accused the House of retaliating against him for trying to help the people of Illinois and said he's confident he'll be "properly exonerated" at a Senate trial.
"The causes of the impeachment are because I've done things to fight for families," said Blagojevich.
"Specifically, I've been fighting for my family. I've gone above and beyond my duties as governor to make sure that my family got what they deserved. If I'm to lose my job for helping the people of Illinois, even of it's only four or five of them, then so be it. I'll just take my beautiful hair and go home."
Huzzah!
Monday!
And listen very closely,
You'll hear my day pass.
Egads! What a day this has been! The morning was occupied by a trip to WCCO radio for a short interview (during which I said, "Yeah," "uh huh," and "Definitely." That's all I said. No more, no less.) After the interview, errands were run and the baby was forced (forced!) into a nap. All that takes time. And now, I have no time left for the finer things, such as blogging. Apologies.
I do have a quick bit of advice, however. If you're planning on making a road trip this weekend (or anytime son, for that matter) and decide to eat at a truckstop, DO NOT order the turkey melt. I know they call it turkey, but friends: that ain't turkey.
Anywho, before I depart, here's Today's Joke:
Blagojevich says his impeachment by Ill. House wasn't unexpected, part of ongoing dispute
The Illinois House voted overwhelmingly Friday to impeach Gov. Rod Blagojevich, setting up an unprecedented trial in the state Senate on whether he should be thrown out for abuse of power.
The governor responded with what has become trademark defiance since he arrested on federal charges a month ago. He accused the House of retaliating against him for trying to help the people of Illinois and said he's confident he'll be "properly exonerated" at a Senate trial.
"The causes of the impeachment are because I've done things to fight for families," said Blagojevich.
"Specifically, I've been fighting for my family. I've gone above and beyond my duties as governor to make sure that my family got what they deserved. If I'm to lose my job for helping the people of Illinois, even of it's only four or five of them, then so be it. I'll just take my beautiful hair and go home."
Huzzah!
Monday!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Scarefully!
Don't worry, baby:
Even from across the store
I can hear your cries.
A quick thought about horror movies:
There has long been a connection between societal difficulties and the horror genre of cinema. George Romero's Dawn of the Dead was in essence a commentary on consumerism.* The gore of the Vietnam War brought about The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.** The American culture's movement towards conservatism helped make Halloween, Friday the 13th, and other slasher movies popular.***
All of this makes me wonder what the up-coming movie Unborn is about. More specifically, what's up with all of the upside-down heads in the trailer? Do they mean something? Are they a response to terrorism changing how we view the world? Are they symbols of our culture being turned on its head by the popularity of Obama? Or did the director just have a thing for inverted noggins? I have a feeling that latter is true: the director just learned how to do that trick with CGI and wanted to get the most out of it. I'll bet in a perfect world, the director would simply fill two hours with video of various heads spinning every which way. And you know what? I'd pay to see that.
Anywho, that's it for today's missive. Please enjoy Today's Joke:
Joe the Plumber: War Correspondent
Joe the Plumber, the Ohio man who became a household name in the presidential campaign, says he's heading to Israel as a war correspondent for the conservative Web site pjtv.com.
Samuel J. Wurzelbacher says he'll spend 10 days covering the fighting.
In an interview with WNWO-TV in Toledo, Ohio, Wurzelbacher says he wants to let Israel's "'Average Joes' share their story."
I'm not adding anything to this. The story is humorous enough on its own.
Tomorrow!
* - Citation needed.
** - Citation needed.
*** - Your momma told me this last night. Bam!
Even from across the store
I can hear your cries.
A quick thought about horror movies:
There has long been a connection between societal difficulties and the horror genre of cinema. George Romero's Dawn of the Dead was in essence a commentary on consumerism.* The gore of the Vietnam War brought about The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.** The American culture's movement towards conservatism helped make Halloween, Friday the 13th, and other slasher movies popular.***
All of this makes me wonder what the up-coming movie Unborn is about. More specifically, what's up with all of the upside-down heads in the trailer? Do they mean something? Are they a response to terrorism changing how we view the world? Are they symbols of our culture being turned on its head by the popularity of Obama? Or did the director just have a thing for inverted noggins? I have a feeling that latter is true: the director just learned how to do that trick with CGI and wanted to get the most out of it. I'll bet in a perfect world, the director would simply fill two hours with video of various heads spinning every which way. And you know what? I'd pay to see that.
Anywho, that's it for today's missive. Please enjoy Today's Joke:
Joe the Plumber: War Correspondent
Joe the Plumber, the Ohio man who became a household name in the presidential campaign, says he's heading to Israel as a war correspondent for the conservative Web site pjtv.com.
Samuel J. Wurzelbacher says he'll spend 10 days covering the fighting.
In an interview with WNWO-TV in Toledo, Ohio, Wurzelbacher says he wants to let Israel's "'Average Joes' share their story."
I'm not adding anything to this. The story is humorous enough on its own.
Tomorrow!
* - Citation needed.
** - Citation needed.
*** - Your momma told me this last night. Bam!
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